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Thoughts From...
Another one of my forays into The
Brunching Shuttlecock's lexicon of features, here we have Thoughts From, a
view into the slightly sub-conscience thoughts that spring to mind during the
day.
The Ski Resort
| The Water Park
The 51's game during Mayor
Oscar Goodman bobble-head night
This is the stadium? This is possibly the
least baseball-stadium-like structure I have ever seen, and I live in Las
Vegas.
This line is huge. What kind of people
come to a baseball game for Oscar Goodman bobble-heads? Besides me that is.
You're going back for more? But won't some
little boy be disappointed that they just gave away the last bobble-head?
Think of the children man!
Misters are possibly the least functional
product in existence.
There's an ad for a crime scene clean-up
service in center field. That disturbs me.
I always cheer for the person throwing the
first pitch, even if it's some guy from American Family insurance. My hope is
to build up enough first-pitch-cheer-karma for if I ever get to do it.
Wait, there's a second first pitch? Why
have two first pitches?
Must keep track of mascot. Must not let
him sneak up behind me.
There are three white squares scattered
over the outfield fence that serve no discernable purpose.
The announcer seems to be having trouble
with last names. And it's not even for the hard to pronounce ones, it's for
ones like "Miller." Maybe it's for effect.
It's true, hot dogs do taste better
at ball parks.
Okay, the fireworks show is over. Wait,
now it's over. No, wait......
The
Ski Resort
Oh, that it were not beneath me to
wear electric socks.
Why do they have to slow down the
lift so much? Is it too hard for some people to sit down?
Is it just me, or does snow never
actually come down in flakes?
Why do companies find it necessary to
misspell the names of their products?
Why are these things always built
directly over rocky outcrops?
How many lives have been saved by the
little bar that you pull down?
Is it really crucial to have both
color and shape to denote the difficulty of a run?
Why don’t they just do green, blue, black, or circle, square,
diamond?
One of these days I’m gonna bring a
Super-Soaker and wail on everybody below me.
Stupid chairlift, it stopped and
I’m not even in the bouncy middle.
Should I ask this guy if he wants to
pull down the bar? It looks like
he doesn’t want to but he has a kid. But
wouldn’t he asked me then? Does
the kid want the bar down but just not the dad?
My feet are killing me.
Why do people stick stickers to the
pole?
Rope tows are cool.
They should have them for all the lifts.
The
Water Park
I'm gonna go on the
steep slide this time, I really am. I'm gonna go on the rapids, then some
volleyball, maybe some tanning, but then I'm gonna go on it.
This is a wave pool? I've seen bigger waves in a shower.
They make you pay for filling up water balloons? Are they going to charge us
for individual slide rides?
Hey, did they just paint the roller coaster over at the Sahara? I could have
sworn it was red five days ago.
How come each slide has a different way to lie while riding? I'm gonna mix
them up and see if anyone notices.
I'm never not buying a tube again.
A kid crapped in the pool?!?! Pee I could understand, but actually take a
dump?
They should build a kiddie park pool for adults. I'd go.
What kind of life does a man live that would posses him to make this
ride? Did he spend a lot of time in the bathroom?
Why did this guy ask if I wanted to be pulled? It's called the Lazy River for
a reason.
There's a definite hierarchy in the Lazy River. The people on tubes are the
upper class and the people just floating are the lower class.....I don't like
the way they're looking at me. Maybe I won't come in with the tube next time.
Uh-oh. The wrist-band for getting back my deposit for the tube is coming off.
Will they except it if it's broken?
Wow. That is steep.
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